Pride & Prejudice

It is parents' pride to have their child excel in exams but at the same time being angry at a child who doesn't perform to expectations is stemmed from prejudice toward those who fail...perhaps fear of it. Today we felt the impact of this when our eldest received results that was not expected (I didn't expect anything but as long as he does well enough). I went to his school to give him moral support and when his name was not called as a recepient of 5As I knew he needed it. I went to look for him amidst the chaos of students pushing eagerly to get their results from the class teachers. Finally I saw this "small" body in the middle of mayhem squatting down, looking desolate and crying uncontrollably. I knew then that being angry at whatever results he got would be cruel. I went to him hugged and calmed him but his tears kept pouring, disappointed! At that moment, I knew that he was frustrated enough for the two of us. So instead of rubbing salt to the wound, I tried to emphatize. My baby was experiencing his very first failure (in the eyes of "society") and heartache. After my son had somehow calmed down he joined other friends who were equally disappointed with their results and he started crying in unison to his mates. One of his friends even looked so forlorn that I feared that he may do something drastic. So I gathered them (and hugged some of them assuring them that there is a wide, wide world out there still waiting for them and that feelings of disappointment, frustration and failure would litter the road to success. I was astounded too at how detached the teachers were, some were uncomfortable to comfort the students who needed it the most..all that was said was ..it's okay there's always PMR. What's wrong with these people??? Are our children just measured by how well they perform in exams? We need to change this prejudice..don't just take pride in success but also let our children learn from failure..no matter how we measure it (for me my son's results was an achievement but for the teachers & society at large, anything other than 5As is not) because the learning is more essential than the results..and I'm not just talking about learning within the 4 walls of a classroom. Let our children explore their potential, let us guide them to the right path, then let them choose their paths in life (insyallah they will choose well) for that is the true meaning of learning. C'est la vie!!!!